my heart is full of dreams, hopes and fantastical wishes. My imaginings are more vivid than they have ever been and I feel that surely, I am closer than I was before to reaching that which stirs me. Even as these pleasing thoughts fill my head and pump through the blood in my veins, filling every cell in my body, I realize, rather disillusioned, that they didn’t reach every cell.
In the background, a chill passes across the recall in my mind and I am, momentarily taken back to last year. It was a hard year. A year full of sickness, injury, tragedy, death and loss. Not just mine, but the people I know personally; my family and friends as well as those I simply ran across on any given day. I found myself in unusual circumstances and, much of it, even with my annoying (I’m often told) optimism which goes a long way in making me who I am, was hard.
It was harder on others I know, the brokenness they had to face, the loss – a dad who lost a brother, an aunt who lost a husband, a daughter who lost a daddy a granddaughter who lost a grandfather; all the same man. And a friend who lost someone beloved to them, someone inspirational. Friends, good ones, are irreplaceable.
Multiple people, my mother included, seriously injured themselves in a fall and I, myself injured myself moderately from two separate falls. Patients come into the office I work and they are hobbling in on canes, crutches; with black eyes and busted ribs. I fell on the curb. I fell down the steps. I tripped on a rug. I slipped in water. I got my feet caught in a cord on the floor. I tripped over a Basset hound. I find it a bit incredulous that I know so many people who had falls last year.
I’m not going to dwell, though. I just thought it worth remembering, one last time, how many things God helped me through last year and to remind myself that He’s the same as He was.
Now, back to more pleasing imaginings.